Friday, January 1st

New Year’s Day

Back at my parents’ house after HUGE argument with Nick.

Am FURIOUS.

Asked Nick to look after Daisy while I went to the supermarket (I always get distracted if I bring her along, and buy random things like special edition brownie Mars Bars).

Got home to find Nick playing computer games, with TEN empty bottles of original Guinness beside him.

TEN BOTTLES! In TWO hours!

I was furious.

‘I’m not drunk,’ he slurred. ‘If I were drunk, I’d never have cracked this part of Assassin’s Creed.’

I demanded he walk in a straight line, and he fell over.

As I was screaming at him, Nick’s mother let herself into the apartment.

She saw Nick on the floor and said, ‘You look tired, darling.’ Then she asked what all the fuss was about.

I said Nick was getting drunk when he was supposed to be looking after a three-month old baby.

‘Oh Nick,’ said Helen. ‘But Juliette, he has been working all day. He’s obviously stressed.’

Working! All Nick’s done today is read a two-page script for an online poker commercial.

‘If I ever need relationship advice from a divorcee,’ I told Helen, ‘I’ll let you know.’

Then I screamed at Nick a bit more, threw a bag together and said I was taking Daisy to my parents’ house.

I would have made a strong, dignified-woman exit, except I had to come back for Daisy’s pink waffle blanket, Teddy Snuggles, blackout curtain with suckers and finally her Lullaby Light Bear.